Hello world! Happy Monday!
I definitely am. I did a lot of celebrating this bachelorette over the weekend:
(I really don’t appreciate that it now takes me so much longer to recover from things like this. And, while I’m complaining, why is it that, at the ripe age of 28, my hangovers are getting worse, but I’m still getting zits on my face?! What is with that, universe?!)
Alas, we must adult. So go ahead and grab your coffee, friends; it’s time to wake up!
– – –
Friend: The spray in the bathroom at work is pumpkin. Pumpkin and poop are not scents that go together… PUMPKIN AND POOP DO NOT GO TOGETHER!
Sister: I used to download the clean versions of songs off Limewire.
Friend: Wait, you illegally downloaded songs, but made sure it was the version without the curse words in it? Why?
Sister: Because, obviously, I was a moral person.
Friend: This man is here, telling me about his stinky butthole. Help.
Friend: Hey, can you see my nipples in this shirt?
Sister: The girl who waxes me got engaged. They took engagement pictures in Paris. Here look at these.
Me: Why do you have these pictures on your phone?
Sister: I was waiting for [Friend] and decided to find her on Facebook and screenshot them and send them to my friends.
*I reach for my phone (to write this down).*
Sister: Becca no! *sighs* I’m not ashamed… kind of.
And finally, this conversation that basically sums up why Katelyn and I are friends:
No Kate, YOU are welcome.
Have a great week everyone. Rawr.